The Girl who does in fact, Sleep

"(A good) sleep routine is the cornerstone for sane mothers and happy children" (paraphrased)

I love this line taken from my friend Sher's blog because it is SO true.

It's such a good line that I have been using it on all my mum-to-be friends, reminding them to not make the same mistake I made because I didn't realise this earlier.

Several people have enquired about Ellis' sleep habits after I posted about it:

1. The girl who doesn't Sleep 29th March

2. The girl who still doesn't Sleep (part 2) 31st March

3. Starting Sleep Training 10th April.

4. Sleep Improvement 13th May. At this point, she was doing an erratic average of 2 naps a day - I willingly and deliberately rocked her each nap time to sleep and held her till she was in a deep sleep before putting her down. This was quite a bit of effort but she did manage around 45 minutes of sleep each time. Only thing is that I had to be VERY careful putting her down because if she wasn't in a sufficiently deep sleep she would stir, cry and everything would be over.

It actually got WORSE after that last post. Almost suddenly, she started struggling when I tried to rock her to sleep. It was impossible to do so - she would lift her feet, place them on my chest and push away. It got frustrating. I actually resorted to nursing her to get her to sleep and regressed from 3 hour to 2 1/2 hour feeds.

About the same time, I was introduced to Tracy Hoggs' The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems by a friend - a book I highly recommend if you need to get your baby on a routine. I bought the book, pored over it, put Ellis on the recommended routine (EASY) and started using her sleep techniques.

From a baby whom I thought "just doesn't do naps", I am now pleased to report that the girl does, in fact, SLEEP.

Here is our current nap routine:

+ Watch for sleep cues. If none, I will initiate nap routine about 1.5 - 2 hours from her last wake time.
+ Pop in her pacifier. Carry her to her room. Play some soothing music.
+ Hold her a bit so she can wind down and settle. Most times I sing or talk to her quietly. Sometimes we have a bit of fun; I tickle her or pretend to nibble on her fingers which she finds extremely amusing. I don't want to overstimulate her though, so this is kept to a minimum. It's really just to make her feel more comfortable.
+ She may squirm a little, which usually means she wants me to put her down. I put her in the crib WIDE AWAKE (no crying), give her her little bolster and a small toy.

+ I tell her that it's her nap time and that I'm going out but I will see her when she wakes up. At this point she usually gives me a cheeky grin. (I think she's thinking to herself :"Yup, Mum I know the drill - you want me to sleep on my own now yada yada yada....")
+ Give her a kiss and leave.
+ She plays for 5 to 10 minutes - and then sleeps on her own (I know because I hear a lot of rustling, and then silence)
+ The whole routine takes 10 minutes or less IF she is already sleepy. A little longer if she's not very sleepy. If she's overtired/overstimulated - it is very difficult, practically impossible to get her to sleep. She'll rub her eyes, fall asleep in my arms but will wake on contact with the crib.
+ Current naps are a minimum of 45 minutes, typically 1 hour 15 mins and have on the rare occasion gone over 2 hours (I actually had to wake her up!)

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About the Baby Whisperer, Tracy Hoggs - Reviews I've read indicate that parents either love or hate her - her tone doesn't go down well with some, and you need to flip around to get all the relevant information, but I did find the book very useful because it gave me a frame of reference to work with.

Her routine for babies is EASY (Eat, Activity, Sleep, You time) and has useful and detailed tips for dealing with common sleep issues - lengthening naps, sleeping through the night, early wakers etc.

Her sleep training technique Pick Up/Put Down is a good alternative for parents who are not comfortable with the more well known Cry it Out method. I used PU/PD on Ellis - can't say it worked entirely but it was a good place to start. It took some made MAJOR modifications along the way based on observing Ellis' responses to my various tactics, but the improvement has been tremendous.I think the key things I tried to achieve was to get Ellis to see the crib as a welcoming place and also to realise that when I leave her to sleep I'm not abandoning her.

It took a LONG time before getting good and consistent results - from the time I last blogged about this topic till now. PU/PD can go on for a good 2 hours and I've had to endure marathon crying sessions in between but things are SO much better now.

Some things I tried that seemed to help:

+ Darkening her room
+ Closing her room door instead of leaving it ajar
+ Singing to her - amazing results. Really calms her down.
+ Talking to her - this seems to help calm and soothe her.
+ Not going to check on her immediately if I hear her cry, especially when she wakes after 45 minutes of sleep. Unless it's a distress call, I monitor and wait for 5 minutes. Many times she's been able to put herself back to sleep.
+ Sometimes if she's still crying after the routine, on those days that I know she's tired but just can't seem to sleep, I take 5. I walk out of her room (after reassuring her I'll check in on her in 5 minutes) and go do something else - laundry, etc. I monitor the crying - many times it just winds down in less than 5 minutes and she falls asleep.
+ It's almost impossible to make her fall asleep by rocking or holding her if she's worked herself up to a hysterical crying mood. So I try to distract her using a toy to calm her down first. When she's calm then I work on getting her to settle down to sleep.